Keep in mind that I was making an inventory of very old, very aromatic specimens preserved in formaldehyde and ethanol. So, I happened to come upon an old, nasty jar of injection-preserved squid (no joke), and I'm all "y helo thar cthulhu." It's also Friday and I'm punchy. That being said, I give you the following completely twisted (and kinda gross) re-written version of "Baby Beluga."

Baby Cthulhu in the great dark sea,
Slept so long in a sleep so deep
Heaven forbid he rise from below, aged Elder God full-grown!

Baby Cthulhu, oh Baby Cthulhu,
What evils have you wrought?
Have screams of terror made you happy?

Down on the seacoast where the humans play,
Where you rose, the blood did spray!
Skulls are rollin' and bones go crunch;
Tentacles wave as you munch!

Baby Cthulhu, oh Baby Cthulhu,
Wail your little song, shriek at your victims --
We've all gone mad!

Baby Cthulhu in the great dark sea,
Slept so long in a sleep so deep
Heaven forbid he rise from below, aged Elder God full-grown!

Now in a jar, you're canned and dead,
Curled up snug in a formalin bed.
Night is placid and the days are fun;
Thank God, my friends, thank God!

Baby Cthulhu, oh Baby Cthulhu,
With your young demise, another sun will rise --
We'll all be waking!

... And that, my friends, is why they should never let me play with chemicals.

-Jen